The Joy of Missing Out

From FOMO to JOMO

Five countries in five weeks may have been a bit overly ambitious.

Somewhere between eight consecutive days of 20,000 steps and my tenth pistachio croissant, I realized I had bitten off more than I could chew 🥁.

Indulging in my tenth pistachio croissant at PARÉMI Boulangerie in Vienna

I had to come to terms with the fact that I would not be able to see (and eat) everything I wanted to without completely wearing myself (and my digestive system) out. And I still had 28 more days to go! I knew the rate at which I was going was not sustainable, so I started to embrace slower travel and enjoy the small, simple things—sitting in cafes with a book, people watching at a park, grocery shopping and getting excited over things I don’t have access to in Japan (COTTAGE CHEESE!).

I once backpacked six countries in three months and found that I needed days where I just sat in the hotel room and vegged out in front of my laptop and watched movies. This was a lesson I had to learn: knowing when to allow myself to just BE and not DO. I think I have always had FOMO, and it’s especially strong when I travel and only have a limited time in a particular place. But that trip taught me that if I didn’t give myself permission to slow down and be ok with not doing it all, I would end up exhausted, crabby and with knees so jacked-up I couldn’t even stroll through the park to get to the grocery store to buy the damn cottage cheese.

So, taking a page from past Morgan’s book, I added some places of respite to my itinerary—peaceful towns and cities off the beaten path with not a whole lot going on, so I wouldn’t feel guilty having do-nothing days.

In the picturesque, walled-in town of Český Krumlov, I spent my days waking without an alarm, afternoons strolling through the park, and evenings sipping Aperol spritzes in cafes along the Vltava River.

In Rosenheim, I got myself a nice hotel room complete with a cozy armchair and—having already stocked the fridge with cottage cheese—spent one full day just writing and reading.

In Bratislava, the smells of doner kebab and cigars brought me back to my study abroad days in Spain. There was a sense of calm and familiarity in the old town area. I found an Irish pub that had live music, but when I saw it didn’t start until 9pm—the time I’m usually already braless—I instead chose to have a rousing Saturday night in with my good buddies Ben and Jerry, watching true crime documentaries on Netflix.

These places hadn’t been a part of my original itinerary, but I am so glad that I included them. Spending time in each one granted me time to recharge and rebalance—and taught me to embrace the “joy of missing out.”

It was because of my time in these slower, smaller off-the-grid places that I was able to more thoroughly enjoy the days I spent in my top-priority cities.

Number one being Vienna.

Reading and sipping an espresso tonic at Drunken Coffee in Český Krumlov

Despite the fact it rained horizontally four out of the five days I was there, I was in complete awe of its beauty. I can’t tell you the number of times I exclaimed, “Holy shit!” Whenever I turned a corner, I was met with an architectural wonder more breathtaking than the last. My jaw was on the ground the entire time I was there.

It’s a city of juxtapositions.

It reminded me a little of Paris in its gritty elegance—graffiti on the walls of stunning historic buildings, dog shit on quaint cobblestone streets, seedy red-light districts around the corner from fancy, old-world coffee houses.

And I love how dog-friendly the city is (as evidenced by the aforementioned doo). There are dog-snack bars, water dishes attached to public drinking fountains, and four-legged friends can even be spotted lounging in those fancy coffee houses where the clientele is dressed to the nines and the waiters don waistcoats and ties.

I was also pleasantly surprised to discover that croissants were invented in Vienna, so of course I had to gorge myself on them at every opportunity. I’ll be bringing back a few extra kilos with me, but not in my carry-on—and I’m totally okay with that.

I wouldn’t let my dog drink from one, but I appreciate the gesture

Before coming to Europe, I thought this solo trip might be like the ones I have had in the past, where I was never truly solo as I met people every day and always had someone to hang out with or talk to. I was hoping it might be like that this time around as well because I have been so lonely living in Japan. It hasn’t happened so far, but like The Rolling Stones said, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might find you get what you need.”

And honestly, I have been thoroughly enjoying the peace and solitude and time to be alone with myself. I looked up events, Meetups, and networking get-togethers in Prague, Munich, and Vienna but decided against going. Sometime between my third novel read and eighteenth journal entry written, I realized I wasn’t craving social interaction—I was craving me time.

I came to Europe for the FOMO but stayed for the JOMO.

On this trip, I have had the energy to explore not just the cities I’m visiting, but the ideas and thoughts that have been packed away in my mind. I have had the time to focus on myself and my own routine and doing things that I enjoy. I have had the space to get reacquainted with the parts of me that have been dormant for so long.

I’m getting exactly what I needed.